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Music. Welcome to design for the creative mind, a podcast for interior designers and creative entrepreneurs to run their business with purpose, efficiency and passion, because while every design is different, the process should remain the same.
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Prepare yourself for some good conversations with amazing guests, a dash of Jesus and a touch of the Woo, woo, and probably a swear word or two.
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If you're ready to stop trading your time for money and enjoy your interior design business, you are in the right place.
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I'm your host. Michelle Lynn, you
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Hey there everybody, and welcome back to the podcast designed for the creative mind. Today, we are diving into marketing, whether you're tuning in from your studio, your car with a glass of wine in hand. Hopefully you're not in your car with a glass of wine.
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I'm glad you're here, because building a business by design doesn't happen by accident. So let me introduce our guest today, Veronica Romney. She is a certified master marketer, an international keynote speaker, a podcast host and the author with over 17 years of experience helping elite brands transform their marketing strategies, she is a former speaker and trainer for Tony Robbins and Dean graciosi, chief of staff at boss Babe and Director of Marketing Suite products for a $2 billion software company. She's seen the marketing industry evolve from every angle. Veronica's mission is to empower marketing teams to achieve record breaking results while reigniting their passion for their work. When she's not making a rain she's hosting the rain maker podcast or wrangling her own two man cubs in or her wrangling her two man cubs in North Carolina.
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So welcome to the podcast, Veronica. Thanks for being here. Oh, thanks for having me. Yeah, I have two little boys who, I mean, anybody who's ever had two little boys, you know that they're part animal when they're little.
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You know, we it's funny, we adopted a girl at at birth. So I have a six year old, and I was always under the impression that girls would be like playing Barbies and reading their book and being nice and calm. But this child, we call her little thunder because she's got all the energy. I can't imagine it's got a strong personality, lots of energy, yeah, lots of energy. But two, that's a lot, so keeps you out of trouble.
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Veronica, I
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just finished reading your book identity marketing, so congratulations. That was such a well put together, thought out, just fantastic read. So that's what we want to talk about today. And for those of you guys listening to make sure you go buy it. Oh, thank you. So let's just dive in. And let's talk about, how did you get How did you land in marketing, and how has this evolution come all the way to I like, what is identity marketing? The name of your Yeah, well, it's interestingly enough, I my parents are Cuban immigrants that had their own air conditioning company wasn't when I was a little girl. So I always had an inclination towards business and entrepreneurship and just that world because of, obviously, the home that I grew up in. I didn't know it was going to be marketing as a discipline that I ended up falling into. Actually, I thought I would do like accounting and finance, because I love math.
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I love math. I loved AP Calculus, like I'm a weirdo. And then I got to school and to college, and I was like, oh, accounting is, like, fake math. This isn't fun at all. Yeah. And then I couldn't secure a finance or internship to save my life. The only one that I could find was a marketing internship. So like, well, it still will give me the credits that I need, so I'll just do that and applied. And the first, like, month or two in this marketing internship with a network marketing company, I was like, This is really fun. Like, this is really freaking fun. Like, who? What? I had no idea. And then they had a finance internship on their finance department open up, like, hey, we can finally transfer you. Like, oh, yeah, finally been wasting all my time. And then I went to the finance department and realized I would just be doing spreadsheets in a cubicle all day. And I was like, Oh, I have way too much personality for this. And so it was because of an internship that I got a taste of marketing past the classroom. And I was like, Oh, I really like this, because marketing, it is, it is creatives, but it's not just for creatives. Like, it's this intersection in the business world of like, where science meets art. You.
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Creativity, but you need the metrics, like you need all of that to fly the brand messaging plane correctly, so to speak. And so I think it actually uses both sides of my brain quite well, and I've been doing in almost 20 years now. Well, interestingly enough, back in 1902 when I was in school, marketing was my major, and I never actually applied it per se through this is my third career, yeah, but now as an entrepreneur, I mean, that's, yeah, it's in everything. And I love reading your book because, you know, obviously it's updated since the Flintstones were in charge.
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That was a long time ago. What can I say? So this, this was really it was a good read, and I love what you said about marketing being the art and science of ethically persuading someone to say yes in some capacity.
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So you know, it doesn't feel cheesy and salesy, which I think is something that you know, most of my audience are women as interior designers, and we're not best at self promoting. Yeah. So this one of that well, and I think it's interesting, because I think, you know, my heart always breaks a little bit when I hear people say that they hate marketing. And I'm like, like, I understand why they say it, because either they have been a victim of it, like shady, unethical marketing taking advantage of them and their hard earned dollar, or the way that they've seen it used with success, feels gross, slimy, salesy, and so they don't even want to come close to even identifying as a marketer. And so, like, it was very important to me before I could even, like, teach you the concept of identity marketing, we needed to still be on the same page with how I define marketing period, just the foundational element of what marketing is. Because when you define it as the ethical persuasion of getting someone to do something for their investment, for their good, their benefit, their self actualization, then I actually know no woman who does not identify as a marketer like I am in the ethical persuasion of getting my children to brush their teeth every day, which will help them avoid cavities. I am in the ethical persuasion of getting the PTA or the school board to do something on the behalf of the kids or my spouse to do this or like I'm every single day I'm ethically persuading somebody that I care about to do something not for my benefit but for their benefit. And I dress it and I make it appealing and I make it sexy to make this choice like that's basically what marketers do, at least ethical marketers, when we're doing it for their good, not our good. And so that's why it was really important to me to identify what marketing is, so that you could feel prouder to say, yeah, actually, I do. I am a practitioner of this practice, right? And I think that by defining what marketing is, you taking it to that next level, yeah, identity, marketing. And I really, I related to this. And I have, you know,
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a portfolio of businesses, and it was interesting to look at each business through the lens of this type of marketing. So, so with that, let's, let's talk about what is marketing, and let's dig into that, because I think everybody listening is going to really benefit from this twist on it. Yeah, so identity marketing, as defined by the book myself, it's basically connecting your brand, your services, your offers, your products, so deeply with how I self identify, which is basically who I see myself as and who I wish to become, that I will literally have the devotion, potentially of being buried in your brand, which is what we see, right? So, so when you say I, you're talking about the the audience's listener, the audience is correct, your buyer ecosystem, like the people that are potentially looking for an interior designer and wanting to connect with somebody that they're going to trust in their home, they're going to start circling you as the as
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brand, yeah, and that's why the the book opens with the story of a Harley Davidson hog, you know, like it's, it's Harley Davidson is a motorcycle company of 120 plus years, they are not in the business of death. It would not be a very good look for a motorcycle company to be in the business of death, but ironically, they actually are in the business of death in some capacity, because 1000s of families a year will privately and personally commission these private Harley Davidson logoed casket so that their loved ones can be buried as a hog, like they they so deeply identify as a writer, as a hog, that they want to be buried in that brand. And we see it all the time. You can't go to Harley Davidson and like click Check out on a cast.
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Basket. Like, that's not, they're not selling that these families are personally commissioning, you know, custom artists to do this work for them. And that's what I mean. It's like, you know, I think sometimes we look at our buyers just as buyers, like, Oh, your buyer, 2375, or your customer, or client, 59 in my portfolio. And the truth is, like, I don't want to be your customer. 59 I don't want to be your your clientele. 234, I would like to be somebody, a better version of the person I seek to become like. I don't just want to be buried as a writer. I am a hog, and I want to be remembered to my loved ones as a hog.
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So one of the things that you bring up in the book is something that really resonated with me for the past. I don't know.
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I don't know, within this last decade, one of the things that I've heard and I've studied is like, Who do you have to be in order to have the things that you want to in order to have the things that you want to have, and do the things you want to do, and working from the the framework of be do have, versus what most people do is like, what do I need to have in order to do the do, in order to person that I want to be? So So you, and you have it on the back of your book. You have it on your screen behind you.
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You know, our listeners don't get to see the screen. They just get to hear us. But you, you have that, and that really caught my attention. Says, buy this instead of be this. Well, yeah, be this instead of buy this, yeah? Or we scratch out buy this, yeah. So how does how, like, explain how you go about, yeah,
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marketing to your audience, especially in your world, like, I It's interesting, because I've worked with designers in the past, and especially when we, when we have moved homes in different transitions of our lives, like, when we didn't have kids, right? We had a certain esthetic, or desired a certain esthetics, and we had kids, it was like, well, now I desire a different type of esthetic and purpose of these rooms. And then when we moved from Florida to North Carolina, and it was double the square footage, just because of how real estate works in those two states, you're like, oh, you know, like, and every time I have personally moved or have, yeah, added rooms into my life, I always imagined myself, Who am I in this room, like even like in our personal home right now, both my husband, I work remotely in his office is upstairs and my office is downstairs. But like, it was very intentional for me. It was very like i The sincerity, the genuineness of like, Who do I wish to become and how do I want to behave in this command center of my life. This is my room. There's like, there's no other room that's exclusively mine, but my office is my room. I don't share it with my children. I don't share it with my spouse. Sometimes I'll share with the dog, but like, for the most part, this is my room, and it's a version of me that's not always available in the other rooms, like and the other rooms. I'm a wife, I'm a mother, I'm a I'm a friend, I'm a lot of things, but in my office, I'm I'm Commander in Chief. I am. I'm Chief Executive Officer of my business. Like I'm the founder of a company. I'm a thought leader. So like, I want to design a room that embodies that persona, that identity that I have, and it's not about faking it. It's a part of me, but I want to make sure that the space in which I operate elevates that identity, so that I can live it and breathe it so sincerely in that move like so when I think about your audience, I think about what you are literally doing for the people that you serve, you are actually helping them Self actualize room by room. That's a very different narrative in your sales conversations than like, oh, you can buy my package A, B or C, gold, silver or platinum.
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And I think that that is definitely something that once,
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once the designer recognizes that what we do is we change people's lives by creating a space where they can begin and end each day. You know, in a sanctuary, safe space. By I love how you describe Like, who do I need? Who am I in this room? Yes, you're a different person in the kitchen than you are in 100% I am in the living room, in the bedroom and all the things so being
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even the backyard. It's so funny. My husband,
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he has this like these child like, distinct memories. At one point, his parents spent quite a bit. I don't know if it was five figures, six figures, but even back then, that's a lot of money to like properly. Do their backyard. They had a basketball court, they had a pool, they had a fire pit, because they wanted to be the family that everybody congregated to, as opposed to their kids going to their friends houses. They wanted to be the house where the friends wanted to come to Scott's house. So that's even talking about a family identity. We desire to be a family where people come to us. They desire to come play and their kids can.
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Be in our backyard under our supervision, for our children, that's identity 101, right there, but on the family level. So there's individual identity that's happening with design services. There's family identities. All of that is a part of your conversations and and again, until you read like until you have the frame or the the lens of identity marketing, you don't see it as identity work, but it is identity work absolutely. And it's like I said, as I was reading through it and looking at it for each of my businesses, that like, I like, I can tweak this. I understand. Yeah, this is an evolution of general mind. I need to make sure that. In fact, thank you for your time in the bakery. You came through and to my coaching group, the bankers, which is so fun, because I was like, we have an identity. We have bankers
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themselves. The bankers Exactly. Well, that's the best part. And we talked about that in the book. It's like nine times out of 10 when you've been in business for a minute, your people. Because it's psychologically what we do. In the absence of a label, we will self label. It's just something we fundamentally do. It's wild. So even if you especially, especially if you're in any type of community gathering of any kind, because when there's more than one person, then the label. The need for a label is heightened, because now I need to know if you are me and I'm you. And so again, the label will be a social currency that we will exchange, well, I'm a hog, you're a hog. Well, I'm a Swifty. You're Swifty, right? So even in the absence of a brand being super clever in their marketing and coming up with these cool community names, your people independently will actually start to name themselves. And that's what we saw. Harley hogs, the people name themselves hogs before the brand of recognized it Swifties. She never called them that, and they call themselves that. So the fact that your community called themselves bakers before you're like, hey, bakers, like, I That makes complete sense to me,
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and I could it was much easier for me to kind of translate the identity marketing on the coaching side. I really had to spend some time thinking about on my on my interior design business, like, because nobody's going to say, I'm an ML or, you know, that's kind of weird. But I think that people who they want to be, you know, somebody who's catered to, they want to be somebody who's taken care of. They want to be somebody who can hire an individual to translate their feelings exactly into a space so it does it carry? Oh, man, I was my son. So He's 11 now, and there's this show on Netflix, one of those, like home transformation shows, where they come in in 12 hours, 24 hours, they like, you know, completely move that bus type of feeling right? And so he's been watching it, and it's so funny because I just, I'm listening to the language of the participants, these homeowners, where the home was a disaster, and then within 12 hours, you know, it's now this beautiful transformation. Yeah, I know I'm like, if they Oh my gosh, how many things are broken anyways. But like, it's funny because I'm hearing these homeowners, they talk about like, I just feel like I'm such a better parent. I'm such a better mother now that my son has his own room, and he didn't have his own room before, and now, you know, I'm, this is my room with my wife, and I'm a husband that has a room that is worthy of my beautiful wife. Like, it's so interesting how they talk about themselves in these transformations, right? And I think that my audience, I know because I've spoken to 1000s of them, but on a regular week, it's dozens of them. Oftentimes, we don't value the work that we do because,
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and it's often something that we're just so familiar with you're an interior designer, not a marketer, but somehow you're stuck spending hours on SEO, social media and email campaigns instead of doing what you love, designing beautiful spaces. Marketing shouldn't take over your business. That's why sidemark was built by designers for designers, we offer done for you, marketing services like SEO, paid ads, email and even social media management, so you don't have to lift a finger not quite ready to let someone run it all for you. We also have done with you software subscriptions that include all of the tools you need, along with live coaching courses and 24/7 live support to help you market smarter with a clear plan. Imagine getting back to doing more of why you started your business in the first place. Solve the marketing overwhelm, and visit www.mysidemark.com
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today that's www.mysidemark.com,
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being able to look at it through somebody else's eyes, I think, is such a great exercise. And hear that and what I what I loved about your book as well. So I have it labeled, so I have the I have some little green tabs on here that I'll talk about this on the on the podcast, and then there's pink tabs of like, this is what I need to do. Like, there's a couple
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of takeaways,
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but I love the way that your book is set up. First you explain it, and then you have here. This is how you implement it. So for the.
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Those of you listening, you know, yeah, this is a promotional podcast, but y'all need to go, y'all need to go get this book and and implement some of the details that takes your marketing to that next level. Yeah, yeah, as well. So for me, I mean, it's a famous quote, I think work by Thomas Edison. It's like, what is it? Vision without execution is hallucination. And so, like, I didn't want to just I as a keynote speaker. I could have just made this a keynote speech, like, let's just talk about identity marketing, and a 60 minute keynote, and I inspire audiences, and I go home, right? But what's, what's frustrating for me, and this is why, like the book, the book. It had to have been a book. It had the container of a book. Was the only way that we could have done this properly, because a book will give you the space to add the prescription, the How to if I didn't write it in a book and I just delivered it like a performance. And all I would be doing, and this podcast would be doing, is inspiring somebody like, that's such a great idea. And then I have no idea what to do with it, right? I as a daughter of Cuban immigrant parents who had their own company as a solopreneur myself, like, I really identify with those of us who eat what we hunt. Like I you know what I mean? Like, this isn't private equity, this isn't venture capitalist money. Like we literally eat what we hunt, and that's the type of business I've been operating for years and years. That's how I grew up. And so I wanted small business owners and solopreneurs and creatives to read this book and have it tell them how to do this, so that they could leverage the same benefits of the psychology of identity that a Harley Davidson or a Barbie or even a Taylor Swift could do without being famous, without the tenure and without, certainly, the budget that those big brands have. Yeah, because, and if I recall in your book, like none of them created those identities. They were they were organically given to them, and they accepted that.
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So you come up with the idea for identity marketing? Well, that's a personal it's actually a personal answer, because I didn't come up with it like I did not have on my 2024,
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vision board to write a book. In fact, the complete opposite. I was going to take a step back in my business because my little sister had been diagnosed with breast cancer in october 23 so I walked into the to last year not even knowing what was going to be the outcome of Valerie's, you know, crusade. Now she can, I proudly identify as a breast cancer survivor, but at the time this, she was a breast cancer victim, you know, we didn't know what was going on, and we were trying to figure it out. I had a very aggressive chemo plan, you know, ahead of us and so but for me, I had already doing marketing for here, I mean, decades at this point, and I was helping my marketers transform into rain makers, and I was helping CEOs be visionary. So like, I was already doing some of this work in some of this work in some of my leadership development programs. I didn't call it identity marketing, but that's kind of certainly what it was. And then when Valerie was going through her breast cancer situation, what I noticed in therapy, thank God for therapy, is like all of our identities were changing. My sister's identity was, I mean, she was a little girl, hair, no hair. She's only 32 and she got diagnosed, right? So she's still a really young woman. My identity was changing. My family's identity was, like everybody was having a very intense response to Valerie's diet, you know, situation. And for me, on a personal note, like I've always identified as a fit person. I've always really prioritized being fit, healthy, lean, whatever. But before the diagnosis of breast cancer in my family, it was certainly an effort that was led by Vanity more than anything, if I'm being honest. Oh, yeah. And then when Valerie got sick, it was like, I never want to have breast cancer. I never, I would never want to put my family, my children, through that. And so it wasn't so much about what I wait or what I look like. It was more like, How can I live to 100 How can I how can I do this game with longevity? And so now I'm the person that will scan bar codes at their grocery store to see what's carcinogenic. And I'm like, it's I am a fit person. I still identify as a fit person, but the source, the why behind my identity changed interesting because of something very personal. And I was seeing that a lot with my clients, like their their transformation in their job titles, you know, if you were employed and then you became entrepreneur, that's a whole new identity. If you barely identify as a marketer, and now you're like, Oh, I like Veronica's definition. I could, I could own that, you know, like everybody's grappling with identity. And so that's that word I wrote on my mirror after, like, a therapy session, and then, within two, three months, it became a book. Interesting, funny, how God works that way, isn't it? It's exactly how God works. It's exactly how he works. Yeah. Love.
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That absolutely love that. And it's so it's so on point, because the world has freaking changed 100
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and, I mean, I'm sure you've noticed it, like, just in the what? Well, for one, the economy's changed in the past couple years. People are not buying the way you they used to buy. You had mentioned it in the book, like, you've got the pandemic, and you've got, you know, lock the lockdowns, and just,
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I mean, heck, we're not even going to go down the bunny trail of just our political men in the country. Like, everything is different than it was, well, and how could it not be? And that, yeah, there was a part in the book where, like, again, by the nature of the work that I do, I work with a lot of companies that are seeking a pivot, a rebrand, a revitalization and evolution of their brand. Like those are very buzz wordy words in my world. And the entire time that, like, I'm helping these brands navigate their next chapter. The whole time I'm like, you guys, like the person that we're not talking about that's actually going through the biggest rebrand of their life, is the buyer, the consumer, right? I think about all that we as buyers have gone through in just the last four years like it's absurd. The woman that I was, the leader that I was, the mother that I was pre pandemic, post pandemic, radically different. And last year, regardless of where you lean politically, it was still very stifling, suffocating political atmosphere that affected the entire globe. Like our elections really has consequences everywhere. And it was way more than just people screaming at you, like, Who are you voting for? Like it was, it was a lot of identity based like questions, what do you stand for, and how will your vote either affirm that identity that you possess and like, even within the different parties, like I know that my dad used to identify as more like a Ronald Reagan Republican, and now you have a Trump Republican, even in the Democratic Party, like these parties are trying to figure out their identities, because their their voters, identity has changed. It's fascinating to watch from a marketing perspective. Well that, and I think that as you saw, I would imagine that as you saw all of these shifts, like as as entrepreneurs, when we start seeing patterns, then you have to connect those dots in order to move with it. I have a friend of mine, instead of saying pivot, she says, You have to twirl like I don't.
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I love that. Actually, yeah, let's twirl. That's so cute. Do you have to do in in order to stay relevant? So I think that your identity marketing, giving it an identity of this new format and this new form, this new way of looking at marketing is so applicable, but it's so relatable.
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I appreciate that, and I love the twirl. I love because that's a positive response to potentially a negative. Yeah, and that, by the way, markets change all the time, like that's not new, but what we're seeing, it feels radically new in many ways for a lot of especially if you've only become an entrepreneur in recent years, like, if anybody really joined entrepreneurship and had their LLC registered in the pandemic Gold Rush era 2024 and 2025 is a very different feeling. And so I think a lot of people are grappling with that, like, right how do I how do I conduct business? How do I attract the right people to me in a way that's really authentic, but also really integral, because I don't want to do anything out of integrity. And so I think people have been discouraged that they've had to, like fear monger or scare people, or like urgency scarcity their way into a purchase. And I'm hoping, with this book, with this alternative, be this energy versus this, by this kind of pitch slapping energy, that they that there will be hope for business owners that, like marketing, can feel good and still win well. And I think that for those individuals who are in business to serve others, which is yes, you know, my my audience, yes, agree. Art is, is, you know, almost to a fault people pleasing, but in that respect, it makes it so much easier, 100% because it's being who you are, authentically and from the heart and truly. Like I always joke that, you know, it's I'm I'm 50 something years old, and I'm finally comfortable in my own skin and laughing right now. So that's saggy skin at this point. But finally, it's just but for those who are listening, who can be comfortable in their own skin early in life and own your own badassness, your own personality, your own quirks, your own properness, like whatever like that's what's going to attract your clients to you. So it's so much easier to be yourself and allow people to be attracted to you because they see something of themselves in you. Totally. I'm a little weird and quirky, right? That's fine, but weird, so get me.
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Yeah, it's so funny to me because, you know, I I've been a marketer for almost 20 years, and, like, I still have to work with other marketers to help me market myself. Because who are marketers? The worst at marketing themselves? Like, yeah, like, we're designers, the worst, yeah. And so it's just, it's just interesting because it's, it's so easy to do it for other people when you stand on the outside of their world, but because we are so in the inside of our jar, in the inside of what it is that we do, our genius, our expertise, are just everything. It's physically, objectively impossible to be objective with yourself. You can't ever see the label through your jar, right? And so what's cool about identity marketing is not that brand identity isn't radically important. Like, Harley Davidson has one of the most iconic brand identities on the planet. Like, you know, Harley hog, when you see them, yeah, but you're talking Yeah, or here down the street, yeah. But identity marketing isn't about the brand identity. It's about the identity of the customer. And if we start, and I make the argument that we start with the identity of the customer first, and then align your brand's identity with the identity of the consumer, but it also has to be in line with who you are, 100 especially as a personal brand, absolutely, especially as a personal brand, yeah. So being comfortable with who you are,
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I think, allows people to trust you. So going back what you're talking about earlier, that's, I think that's the point I was trying to make, is that it has to be congruent with your value, yeah, otherwise people are going to see right through it. And yeah, talking about is, is what the what the buyer believes about themselves.
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And I think we always want to see the good in our we always want to feel the good in ourselves. So seeing it in somebody else gives them permission to join. Yeah, it's always so fun. So now that the book has been out for a couple weeks, and so several people have gone through one of our workshops with us to, like, actually implement our code into their business. It's so funny because, like, there was the world before identity marketing, and then there's the world after, like, once your eyes have been open, like, once you notice there's white Volvo now you see white Volvos everywhere. It's the same kind of psychological phenomenon, like, once you understand that the world operates on identity first, not outcomes first. Then every sales call you have, every conversation that you're having, you'll hear people talk about they're both positive and negative. They can talk about themselves in both the affirmation and the detraction. But you'll hear now you start to hear how they talk about themselves, the woman they want to be, the mother they want to be, the homemaker they want to be. Like, it's fascinating. And so people will reflect back to I was like, Yeah, I was just on a sales call, and they were saying this and this and this about the identity and what they've been saying it this whole time, but you just didn't see it like that, right? Is that dissonance cognitive? Yeah, yeah. Um, so it's so true now, just having read this, uh huh. Now you go back and you're like, I see it everywhere, yeah, and super secret, we can't tell anybody, but I'm going to be rebranding my design for the creative mind business, and taking a lot of this into consideration. Oh, this is really good timing. I
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was like, Okay, this is this is perfect. This is really good. So let me ask you this, who so with kind of this, who do you need to like be this? Who do you need to be, personally? So switching a little bit from the marketing tactics, but who do you need to be to lead your company?
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So from an entrepreneur to an entrepreneur?
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Yeah, so it's so okay. So this was really important to me. I kind of concluded the book with like, a bonus section, because part one is like, what is identity marketing? Part two is like, here's all these epic examples, you know, to like, really inspire the hell out of you. And then part three is like, the How to framework, right? It's a four step framework. But we added, I was like, I got advised not to do this, and I was defiant. I'm like, Nope, I can't end this book without discussing culture team leadership. And so part four is identity beyond marketing and sales, right? This is really important to me, because I just I feel deeply that like when leaders have identity crisises. They are not the most effective leader for team and culture, right and so. And this is, I would say, this affects everyone, but most, most severe, will it impact the solopreneur, the small business owner? Because you have to wear all the hats, even more so than anybody else, let's say, in a corporate setting, or in something that the military, anything that was like, highly like, framed up. But when you're when you're the chief everything officer, and you have to start taking on all of these new responsibility and roles, and you're like, wait a minute, why did I start a business? Or.
35:00
So much I don't know what I'm doing. I just wanted to do the one thing that I was really good at, but now I gotta be everything to everyone. Yes, identity is very, very important. And I know a lot of people who don't even properly identify as entrepreneur, they still have the like the Karen or the PAM in their head that tells them that they're a bad business owner or a bad entrepreneur. If you have that narrative playing in your head that reeks out in anything or anyone that you touch,
35:29
how those little voices Shut up, they're just your thoughts. Well, they're trying to, I understand, I understand their function, like I'm such a proponent of ifs therapy, like, I understand it's like it's in the movie Inside Out where, like, anxiety takes over Riley, and then at the end, anxiety says, like, I was just trying to help Riley. Like, I understand why you have these parts that will say these things, because they're trying to avoid, like, if I tell you that you're not good, then you won't do things that will incur failure and embarrassment. Like, I understand they're trying to be protective aggressively, but protective, it's, it's so much about shutting them down as it is, like having an honest conversation with them, like, right? Like, yeah. Why are we Yeah? Why are we saying this? What are you trying? What are you trying to protect me from? Like, I was on a I was doing an identity marketing presentation with a company, literally just this last week, and they the buyer is the woman. It's it's usually nine times out of 10, it's the mom figure.
36:26
But more often than not, in these sales conversations, the paternal figure, the father figure, will enter the sales dialog and be the complete pessimist, the one that's like, why are we doing this? We don't need this. And so the group was asking, like, hey, like, if I'm speaking so positively to the identity of the mother and what she can become and what her family can become because of this product, and then the husband comes in, and he's the detractor. Like, what do I do? And I'm like, I think first, first, you have to understand that when this figure comes in, you're looking at him immediately as a villain. And I would challenge you to maybe consider him not a villain, but in an attempt to be a hero. I know he can seem like a jerk and like really not supporting his spouse and her desires to do something, or he's trying to avoid her getting her feelings hurt, or protecting her from doing something that doesn't pan out for the family yet again, that then would echo that she's a bad mother, because those are some of those are some of those conversations. Like, how many times have I had this vision of my children going to Disney World and it was gonna be so magical, and really, they're having tantrums at like, 130 in the afternoon, and this is, like, the worst I've spent hundreds of dollars. And like, Why did I do this? And I feel like a crappy like, how many times as mothers, have we had those experiences where you thought it would be this and it was a total disaster, and then, and then it means, like, does that mean that I'm a bad mom, and you start to internalize that. So sometimes my husband will even step in. He's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, that's not gonna happen because he's seen what I will how I'll self destruct when it doesn't go according to my deepest desires. And so sometimes I can see him take on that protector part. So I was challenging this company, like, why don't we reframe his identity? It's not that he's the big bad villain in the narrative of your sales conversation. He's trying to protect his spouse from possibly getting hurt if this wasn't to work out, which is why he's skeptical and like, don't over inflate the possibilities of this product. So talk to that protector identity like he's trying to be a hero, not that he's a villain, and you'll see the conversation go differently. I love that, and that will for one you can circle that back and use that for the voices in your head. The voices are correct. But also, oftentimes, that's what happens in our sales process, as I would imagine, is that the woman is the one who's like, yeah, yeah, let's do all this. We want to do this. One do this, and they know why. And then the husband comes in with the checkbook, and it's like, Oh, well. But like you said, he's just trying to protect his spouse. Yeah, he is. And again, remember we as spouses, we we vent to our partners when like, oh, man, I feel like such an idiot. I don't know why I did that. So, like, we're the ones also like that. Well, we want to be saved, or there's that here, like, oh, like, when they come in, they try to, like, serve us with, like, those love languages. You're like, Oh, I feel so loved and affirmed by my spouse when I'm feeling so bad. Well, they're gonna, they're gonna play that role as many times as required. In all situations they can't just turn it off.
39:23
Sometimes,
39:25
give them the checkbook, honey, yeah. Okay, so from a personal standpoint, what is a risk that you've taken in your career that's paid off
39:35
being an entrepreneur? Oh, man, I traded in multiple multiple six figures and a very cush corporate salary structure, and I was bored out of my mind, and I jumped into a marketing agency, and that was the hardest thing I've ever done in my whole life. Like, why did I do this? I cry on the ground like, Why did I do this so hard? Similar story people don't tell you that being an entrepreneur is not for the week of.
40:00
Art, like, I went into my design company, that's the first thing that I started thinking, Oh, I can make everything beautiful. I can set my own schedule. I'm going to make a Bucha and, man, that is the furthest from the truth. Yeah, it's interesting. Like, there's, there's very few, there's very few roads that will be as refining or as revealing, and I find that parenthood, marriage and entrepreneurship are the three roads that have been, to me, the most
40:34
fiery as fires of refined and all by the way, all paved with agency. I wasn't forced into any of those scenarios. I willingly walked into my marriage, into my parenthood responsibilities, and into my entrepreneurial pursuits like I walked into those and I walked that path proactively of my own free will and choice. It was it's so hard.
40:56
Makes you wonder, makes you wonder and curiously. Yeah, well, what would you be doing if you weren't what? Let's say, I know, yeah, if you weren't promoting your book, if you weren't marketing, like, what would you be doing? Oh, I other Um, well, so I was going to answer this because somebody was like, if you were, if you weren't doing marketing, if I had just completely take my love and passion for this discipline and like it, I couldn't do it anymore for whatever reason. What would I do? I think I've probably seen the movie shits Creek, wait, or this theory shits create too many times. Because I would be a mayor. I would literally go into local politics. I would be Mayor Romney. I would kiss babies and shake hands and cut ribbons. I literally have aspirations to be a local politician.
41:41
Well, you know what? You can ethically persuade people to get your way. 100% I can
41:47
been training for that my whole life. So
41:51
when you're so right and like when you, when you frame it under the perspective of as a mom, as a wife, like you are always, always somebody. Always Count. Count how many times in one day you'll see so for those of y'all listening, shift your perspective. Yeah, marketing is great. I love marketing. It gets a lot. It gets a lot done for a lot of people, especially those that you love. Yeah? Amen to that. Yeah. Like Brush, brush the teeth that you want to keep. Yeah?
42:21
So with your book? Okay? So you guys can get this on Amazon, yes, or you can go to identity marketing book.com and we give you all the links, plus we give you all we created all of these goodies, like we have this quiz, Michelle, but it's five questions. If you take the quiz, it will tell you which chapters to prioritize. You don't have to read everything. I loved that you put that you put that in the first party, like, I'm gonna be there tells you not to read the whole damn thing. Well, sorry, girl, but it's true. Like, how many business books do you have in your account? I have so many business books. And, like, the truth is, I don't, I can't, I don't have the capacity to read all of them. And not all of the chapters will be pertinent to my situation, right? So I just took that into consideration. So we made this quiz that, like, forget this chapter. Don't do the Barbie chapter. Do this chapter? Do the the Red Ants pants chapter, right? Like, so we we have just a lot of we have playlists, we have a quiz, we have so many fun things to help you immerse yourself in identity marketing, not just read it. And that's if you go to identity marketing book.com, it's all there. I love that. I think that that is such a great way to keep to keep people on track for what they need, you know. And sometimes it's not always what they want, but it's what they know exactly. Fun, fun, fun. Okay, so besides identity marketing, this is my own selfish question, okay, what would you recommend reading? Oh, I was just telling this to somebody on Friday, and he hadn't heard the book. And I'm like, this is like, life changing it's a life changing book, at least for me. It's called, and I think it has everything to do with identity too. It's called The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks, yeah, it is. And he talks. And this is the thing about identity, when your identity shifts, you will self sabotage your whole body and your subconscious can't handle this like it would. It's like, No, we're set at 75 degree temperature. You're going at 95 degree temperature. It's all good things, but your body will literally sabotage itself to go back to the temperature that it thinks that you're more appropriate at. And so the book is such a great book, because it talks about upper limit problems and self sabotage. You know, it talks about like the Tiger Woods situation, or the Bill Clinton like, you see some of these Pinnacle human beings, and then they're like, why would they ever do that? Their life was so beautiful. They were at the top of their game. And if that's you, if you're in an identity shift right now, in your business, in your marriage, in your life, you're good and bad things might accompany that evolution, because opposition all things, but part of it could be your own self sabotaging behavior. So that book was really important to me when I left corporate and became an entrepreneur, and I read it actually more often than not, interesting. Yeah, I've read it years ago, and it's great.
45:00
Hearing it from your perspective. It's like, I might need to go back and yeah, it's just a good it's a good refresh on what we psychologically do to ourselves, if not fully aware and mindful. Okay, so that takes us back to that piece of our conversation that we were talking about in relation to the voices in our head and then the protectors. Yeah, you know, they're protecting us from not getting hurt. They're protecting us, you know, losing loved ones. Like, if I make too much money, will I not will my family not be close to me anymore? Or will my if I make more money than my spouse? Like, think about all the things that you do or could lose or at risk with more success. And those are things that will play in the backdrop of our actions if we're not careful, that will then guide us without even realizing in the wrong direction. Yeah? Okay. Note to self, the big league.
45:50
Yeah. Good stuff. Good stuff. Well, Veronica, I could probably sit here and talk to you for about another hour or seven or so so. Well, you're a very good host.
46:00
Well, it's, you know, what's funny is that I came into this podcast kicking and screaming, not really wanting to do it, like, Who has time? I have multiple I've got a family, like, Who wants but I love the opportunity to just talk to other people and learn their perspective and so forth. So I just, I loved your book. Love getting
46:22
and the session that you gave to my bakers, yeah, they just loved it. So this,
46:30
how can the audience connect with you? Where can they find you? You? I mean, Veronica romney.com, is my little hub, but on social media, if Instagram and LinkedIn are probably my two favorite platforms. So if you if you if there was something in this conversation that you loved, words of affirmation are my love language. Go and send me a note. DM me. It's me, and just let me know what part of this conversation meant the most to you. That would be chef's kiss. That'd be great. Love, that love, love, love. So y'all check her out on Instagram. It's yeah on Instagram, it's just v Romney everywhere. Also, you guys, V Romney. You guys need to get the book, because you'll hear all about the people. Caller, V that's fun. Yeah, that's very funny. So y'all speaking of social media, head on over to the interior designers business launch pad on Facebook. That is a private group. And yeah, yeah, I know it's Facebook, but it's the best place to have a free and private group. And we will be hosting a workshop coming up at the beginning, at the end of April, end of March, beginning of April. It's called rolling in the dough, and you can get all of the information over there. So that is a wrap on today's episode. If you loved what you heard, don't keep it to yourself. One go and DM Veronica on the gram and share a designer who could use a little inspiration. Yes, for sure. So remember that success doesn't happen by chance. It happens by design. So thanks for being here, Veronica. It's been a pleasure. And if you guys need help, if you ever need a hand, I've got coaching and mentorship programs you can head over to, designed from designed for the creative mind.com
48:11
see you on the inside. Hey, y'all, if you love the show and find it useful, I would really appreciate it if you would share with your friends and followers, and if you like what you're hearing, want to put a face with a name and get even more business advice, then join me in my Facebook group, the interior designers business launch pad. Yeah, I know it's Facebook, but just come on in for the training and then leave without scrolling your feet. It's fun. I promise you'll enjoy it. And finally,
48:41
I hear it's good for business to get ratings on your podcast, so please drop yours on whatever platform you use to listen to this. We're all about community over competition, so let's work on elevating our industry one designer at a time. See you next time you
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